Learning to Live Without Him...
A widow at 26? Most people wouldn't think of a widow being so young. My first husband passed away February 3, 2006 leaving me with a 16 month old and a 7 week old to raise. It is years later, I have remarried and living life again.
Wednesday, July 6, 2016
Wednesday, June 24, 2015
HELLO KEURIG!
HELLO KEURIG 2.0 FROM INFLUENSTER!
Tuesday, August 9, 2011
Home Alone
Evie was 7 weeks old when Jim passed and now she is starting school. Time passes so fast! I can't believe my kiddos are both in school now. Today is my first day home ALONE! What is a mommy to do with herself? Oh yea, dirty clothes, cleaning house, grocery shopping, etc. And let's not forget the massive hill that needs mowing! Oh well, even though they are both in school now my life has not slowed down.
Friday, February 18, 2011
Love Happens
Okay, so I haven't blogged in some time. I always seem to have a bad habit of taking time off but I have a wonderful reason why this time. I FELL IN LOVE again. That's right! I have met a wonderful man named David who won my heart. Actually, we sort of knew each other from church years before. It's funny how I look back on the time we first met and never thought I would look at him as being the man I fall in love with. God works in crazy ways but I sure do like his way of working. I will keep you posted but for those of you who have experienced the loss of a spouse, keep the faith. God knows...
Sunday, July 4, 2010
Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Five Favorite Things
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
A Battle Lost
Have you ever come across people in your life that have to use hatred, rudeness, cruelty and many other "nasty" forms of expression to over come the pain they have endured throughout their life?
Well, I have lately. I even sunk to their level once and threw the nasty back to them but NO MORE. I felt worse from intentional trying to hurt them than I did from stomaching their harsh words. Now, I am the first to stand up and admit my faults. I know I can be extremely unbearable at times but I NEVER set out to deliberately hurt anyone.
I think the worse thing about people of this nature is I just want to embrace them and remind them that there are great doors that can be opened and true happiness does lie behind them. But somehow the closer you try to get, the nastier they become.
So, today I wave my white flag to all you nasty people who have displaced your pain. Please know that you are doing no one, not even yourself, justice.
A Single SuperStar!
That's right folks, I am a single SUPERSTAR! I somehow made it to the famous iListPaducah.com page again as the iDate of the week. How fun is this?
You know what though, I feel like I have really conquered the single world in my life. Really! TASK accomplished! But somehow my grade got changed to an F and I am having to repeat it again. So with the help of Match.com and now, iListPaducah.com, I am bound to find my soul mate #dos!
Yeah right, I have this feeling I will be repeating this grade aka status, many times and mainly due to me being picky, but he's out there. I just know it. Until then, cheers to me for my Super Stardom in the Single World!
Friday, March 5, 2010
Operation Get Kids Healthy
Okay, so every Wednesday the kids go to gymnastics for an hour. This past week I noticed Stetson huffing and puffing after 15mins of playing hard. I couldn't believe that I let him get to this point of being so out of shape at the age of 5. I haven't been the healthiest person in my life but over the past 8 months I have really changed. Now it is time for me to step up to the plate and help change my kids but mainly my son. I refuse to bury my son because he passed of heart disease so this is my full-time mission! This isn't a "I hope to succeed" mission, this is a " I HAVE TO succeed" mission!
Monday, March 1, 2010
2920 Days
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Half Way There
Friday, February 5, 2010
Super Woman
So as you all know, I hate February. I just want to take the strongest sleeping pill and wake up in March, but unfortunately I don't have that option. So, I deal with it. I relive the pain of losing Jim all over again. My sister-n-law said it best once, "there is just an irie feeling that comes over me in February." And bless her heart, she had to experience the pain of losing her brother on her birthday. The day he was buried, she celebrates another year of life. Ironic, huh? Either that, or just another one of God's tests. I have had a lot of people call me "Super Woman" but she is truly a "Super Woman" to me. So cheers to you Sarah and happy birthday!
Monday, February 1, 2010
I curse you February!
Sunday, January 17, 2010
Friday, January 15, 2010
Some Things I Never Learned
Now, what in the world were the kids doing while mommy was cooking? Well, here are those pictures too. I have a mess in my house but we all had a blast!
Monday, October 5, 2009
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Ten Guilty Pleasures
Wednesday, July 29, 2009
Failed
Sunday, July 5, 2009
30 Day Challenge
So, I am starting the 30 day challenge on July 5, 2009! My goal is to lose at least 15lbs and increase my energy. The weight is important but the ENERGY is extremely important. I will log everything I eat, drink and all of my workout time, etc. I will also bitch a lot along with brag a lot when my pants start fitting better. So, if you are not up to my challenge, then you might want to refrain from coming to my blog for 30 days. I will however, keep posting pics and blogs in conjunction to this challenge.
Monday, June 29, 2009
A Miracle!
Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Not so much a Master of his own Domain
*Please note that this blog is for adults 18 and older.
Ok, so I haven’t blogged in awhile and mainly because I have bee
But there is a part of this vacation that was jaw dropping experience. I do have to say this was a first for me and I am sure many of you.
Monday, June 8, 2009
Movin' Up
So, I spent the past weekend in Chaffee MO. As some of you know, I grew up close to the area but can honestly say I don't remember ever stepping foot in Chaffee. And when I say foot, I mean foot! This town isn't large enough for both of your feet. Although, it is quite small, it does have a comforting charm to it.
During my visit I was given the "grand" tour. The city center (cough) had an adorable little gazebo in the middle and of course, I had to snap a shot. Now it still needs some more tweaking but I am proud to say that it will soon hang over the toilet of a well know Chaffee celebrity! Yep! That's right! So, for those of you who had little to no faith in my photography future, HA! Just take a visit to the bathroom next time you are in Chaffee and you will see my work above a porcelain god.
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
DFL
Now, I am not going to say that I am "perfect" at keeping this from happening to me and disturbing others but I do try to prevent at all cost. Like Jim's death, I was unable to prevent that and God knows I would have had he giving me the power. But calling everybody and their mother's to bitch about spilling M&M’s all over the floor? Geez, just pick the damn things up and go on with your life. (FYI...I have seen this example in person, not fun!)
Speaking of going on with your life, I truly believe one thing that can cause the big "D" is rehashing the past. I know people go through some really horrible times. But reliving it on a day to day basis is only going to cause pain which will only make you become a person no one wants to be around. I really wonder if these people ever think about this? Would you want to sit at a bar listening to Sue cry over her boyfriend or would you want to listen to Jenny make fun of her ex-boyfriend? It is the same thing about your past. Nobody wants to hear me talk about Jim all the time and have me cry about him and the pain his death caused me and my kids. That is why I do it here. You can choose not to read my DRAMA!
So here today, I declare my goal is to live the DFL (Drama Free Life)!!
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Sink or Swim
I have officially signed back up to the world of online dating. I have tested these waters once before and either became overwhelmed or disqusted with it...not sure which one. Maybe it is the smell of Summer in the air or just plain boredom that leads me back down this road. Either way I am out there again.
I go back and forth on the concept of online dating. Does it show desperation or is it genuinely a great invention? Uh...don't know. What I do know that sitting at home on a Saturday night watching movies is never going to "get me out there." FYI...I do this not by choice hence the two pictures on the right of this blog.
But really, for the desperation side of this, I don't understand what guys are thinking half the time. I get amazed at the number of them who truly think that emailing me to say "You're Hot!" is really going to get them a second look. Yeah, I'm hot...pshhh...in my PJ's with apple juice spilt all over me while inhaling a corndog watching SpongeBob. Yeah, that's hot. Come on, can't you come up with anything better? Seriously? If I can't carry on a 5 min conversation with me via email or phone, what makes you think I want to live the rest of my life with you? (ok, jumping the gun a bit with that statement) Or even have an hour dinner with you? Really?
Either way it is perceived in my mind, I am out there again. I know that I will either sink or swim and I am crossing my fingers that it is swim but if not, have a towel waiting to dry me off!
Sunday, May 24, 2009
Man Projects
Let's just say, rooster's do the same!
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
My Addiction
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Stable or Unstable, that is the question
You would think that after 3 1/2 years, I would be stable. But stable is still a word/feeling I am trying to establish in my life. I feel like most days I just run in a circle, trying to figure what to do next. I try hard to avoid the natural things I should be doing, like cleaning, cooking and washing clothes. Although, I have taught myself not to look ahead, I still look for different. Something to keep me motivated to go on to the next day. I think a lot, that if I had to live everyday the same way without Jim, I would go nuts. Then I think a lot of times, my kids need more consistancy in their lives. I should make a
What happened to my stable life? What happened to full-time work, family breakfast/dinners, grocery shopping only on early morning Saturdays, Sunday lunch after the church? These are just a few things that were consistant in my life with Jim. We had our routine, we had our way of doing things. Now, who knows when and where we will be. Who knows what tomorrow will bring.
So, you probably think that I grieve a lot. But honestly I don't. I just let it all out here. I try hard not to think about Jim and my stable life. I try not to let it bring me down. But I do miss it. I do miss Jim. GOD, I miss Jim. I miss his laugh, his warmth, his love. It is crazy how he can be gone almost longer than we were together and yet, I still miss him.
My son asked this week if he could take the picture of Jim out of room to school to show his friends. Yet again, I was taken back by this but agreed. The more I think about it, the more it upsets me. He shouldn't have to take a picture to prove to his friends that he HAS a daddy. He should be able to have his daddy pick him up. And so should me daughter. Why? Why is this still SO hard?
(picture taken at the birth of my daugther, 7 weeks before Jim's passing)
Thursday, May 7, 2009
Saturday, May 2, 2009
Monday, April 27, 2009
Why is love so hard to find and keep?